Nobody Wins

It has been a bad couple of days. First the Dr crap yesterday and now a sinking feeling that I am losing things dear to me.

Some friends of mine, a gay couple are in crisis. I can't help at all and it is frustrating. Sadly, good news and a chance at a dream job for one is tearing them apart. M is younger and an up and coming professional in his field. He has been offered and has accepted a position out west. Big money, promotion opportunity, more responsibility; the things young, ambitious men want.

S, on the other hand is older, loves his house and junk, looking to retire, has a secure job with wonderful benefits here. He is loathe to move. But then, as he put it, men like M do not come along every day. Don't I know it. No matter what the decision, it will be a lose-lose all around. M is going, no question. The question is if or when S goes. He is wavering and the issue has exposed some weaknesses in their relationship, as all have. Selfishly, I would love them to stay. I'll be lost without S even more, he is the brains behind keeping the Queen Mary afloat.

It hurts to watch both of them strained and stressed. S cried on my shoulder over the phone over an hour last week. I think they will both go eventually. But no one will be happy.

Again, I guess it is consolation to be single; Puggles goes with me, no questions asked. And she has few ambitious plans besides a place to nap and a treat or two.

The other is my dear Nicaragua. I see it getting ugly and dangerous. This article gives a good idea what transpired. I was there when this happened, I heard first hand about the mob, I stayed up on the hill, out of town. I may not go back to San Juan, and any thoughts of living there are gone.

Gringo Justice

Jamaica is like this, I am told. You go to the resorts and stay there under lock and guard. Venture out and the racism and hatred of the Jamaicans is real. Gays are murdered for sport. Nicaragua has always been a bit different. The people open, friendly, but not real demonstrative or emotional. I relished my interactions with them, I made friends with many. But now, I wonder if I should fear them?

I guess it was inevitable. The mix of rich and dirt poor is a volatile one. Gringos with money (that includes US, Canadian and European) have came in and bought land, started businesses, developed property. Some mix with the people, some do not. With the rise of Daniel Ortega and his connections with Chavez and Castro, I can only assume his anti-gringo rhetoric will increase, despite his protests to the contrary. He will do what it takes to please his master Chavez. The Sandinista mayor Sr. Eduardo Holmann, quoted in the article, has developed his own housing development and property for the gringos and ricos. His power rests on the gringo presence.

It is so complicated in Nicaragua, because "La mentira es la Vida" (The Lie is the Life). One lies, in more of a sin of omission, to survive the poverty and the oppression of the corruption. Nicas will often tell you what you want to hear so as not to offend or disappoint. The will not reveal their true feelings to you so as to keep you as a friend when needed, and an enemy when advantageous. I am suspicious now, is this the real feelings of the locals? I do not know, a mistrust has developed. I asked a Nica, my favorite bartender Arturo if he resented all the gringo invasion. "No, mas trabajo", (no, more jobs) he said quickly, otherwise he'd have nothing. What does he really think?

I watch the outcome of this with interest and trepidation. I know Eric slightly, and I understand he was in Managua when the murder occurred. But for some reason, the Nicas want his scalp. Injustice is ugly no matter where. There is no excuse for it, but to send a message. Be careful of what you ask for, you may get it.

I am Too Sweet

Sigh...it is official. Dr Haynes told me at 10AM this morning that I have diabetes. Fun. Joy.

"Lose some weight, more exercise.... yadda yadda yadda.... I want you to go to nutrition classes, and some diabetes classes too.... yap yap yap."

She has always annoyed me, I like her partner Dr Henley better. But Henley was the one that found my blood sugar high, he just happened to not be in today. So I can blame him too.

I guess it was inevitable. I do weigh too much, but I am exercising more than ever before. I have a job that gets me up and down a lot, I have not had a donut in months. But the results do not lie. I have had a bit of high blood sugar before, years ago. My grandfather was diabetic. It runs in the family; thanks Gramps.

I had to get one of the glucometers where you prick your finger and put a drop of blood on the little test strip. I have to do it twice a day and keep a log of the results. It reads your number. The lower threshold for diabetes is 125. I was 217. Just a tad high. Guess no more donuts for sure.

My blood pressure was high again too, but we will deal with that next month. One malady at a time.

I guess I have to change my habits, I want to live a bit longer to annoy people and see George Bush suffer.

State of the Union

I actually watched a bit of the State of the Union Address by the pathetic Emperor, now facing a revolt in his court. I wanted to see him in more contrite role. I was not disappointed It was great seeing Nancy Pelosi behind him, Dick Cheney looking bloated and dull next to the more vibrant Pelosi. Cheney also looked absolutely bored.

Bush yet everything he said he has said before. Bush continues to trot out bad ideas he longs to foist on us such as radically changing Social Security, bogus healthcare savings, tax cuts for the wealthy (my taxes have gone down 0% since this goon has been in office), these risky healthcare savings accounts, or worst, escalating the war he started in Iraq. Then he went into his litany of goals he has no intention of nor idea how to achieve. He has harped on the need to conserve energy and free ourselves from dependence on foreign oil in every State of the Union address and has no intention of doing anything meaningful about it.

One good point, at least he decided it was time to stop attacking Gay and Lesbians and their families by calling on Congress to enshrine hate and bigotry in the constitution by defining marriage. He finally realized it was going nowhere. Seems he is so fucking dense, it takes him years to to figure that out.

Democrats were swift to challenge his tepid, recycled ideas. "While the president continues to ignore the will of the country, Congress will not ignore this president's failed policy," Speaker Nancy Pelosi and Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid gave Bush said in a joint statement after his address. "His plan will receive an up-or-down vote in both the House and Senate, and we will continue to hold him accountable for changing course in Iraq."

Bush is a disaster. A world wide poll continues to show US influence and approval at all time lows throughout the world. I find it hard to believe the whole world is stupid and Bush is right.

Nothing new, a subdued and wounded Emperor, it was a mixed affair. Since every idea Bush had has been a disaster for the US, we should rejoice that he did not offer any new ones.

Fun with Spam

My sense of humor is very warped. So as I find these lines belly laugh funny, you may not.

Like many of us, I get a ton of spam emails. Lucky, my main email account sends them all to the spam ward. Occasionally I view them to see if a legit email got caught in the spam catcher. Always they provide a bit of amusement. Who said spam mail is useless?

There is a proliferation of emails with normal sounding names but strange message titles. Usually selling erection pills or some sort of get-rich-quick scheme. I send them all to East Spam Hell (Much worse than West Spam Hell) after getting a chuckle or two. Here is a recent sample, see if we have the same warped sense of humor.

Lottie Vance sent me an email titled "He Mistress a Sag"
Enid Norman wrote to tell me "He execrable it cygnus" (hate when that happens)
Sabrina Padilla wants me to know "as thompson my maddox"
Corina Glenn tells me "It be quota" (no doubt there)
pledge plugin, Someone with a flair for alliterations writes: "muziek, myblogs mydomains myths... Pakistan palm pandora panorama papers"( I picture kids jumping rope)
And this is just today.

I am not so clever to think of these little names and such. I think it must be someway to try to beat the various firewalls and filters and such. Mine catch them and throw them out... but not until I have a little laugh at their expense.

Damn, I hate it when my mistress is a sag....

Kansas City Symphony Beethoven Sibelius and Ives

PDQ Bach forever ruined Beethoven’s Fifth Symphony for me. Used in one of the comic genius' parodies "New Horizons in Music Appreciation". The first movement of the symphony is performed with a "play by play" commentary. "They're off!" as the opening motto is sounded. The violins' held note after one entrance of the theme and a bobble from the horn elicit commentary on whether the instrumentalists involved will be traded. "What!?? He thinks it's an oboe concerto!!!" follows the short oboe cadenza. I just can't help my self, it takes all my will power not to shout the phrases out, as if it were a "Rocky Horror Picture Show" screening.

Thankfully I have some self control as the Beethoven 5th was performed as the second half of the Kansas City Symphony concerts this weekend, Michael Stern conducting.

The first movement was played with a strong sense of forward motion; the brisk tempo never seemed rushed. Stern mined the incredible tension and release that Beethoven wrote into this monumental movement. No matter how often it is heard, there is no doubt that it is one of the singular achievements in western music.

The slow movement again never dragged but was a nice contrast to the other three movements, something that can not always be said about many performances. The demonic scherzo was powerful and driving. I missed a bit of mystery in the transition from the third movement to the finale, which made the triumphal theme of the last movement a bit tepid. Some blatty horns did not help. The final chords were perfectly together and brought the performance to a solid and satisfying conclusion. As usual the woodwinds were excellent, the strings only problem being a lack of numbers. What a few extra strings would do for the sound.

The first half comprised the Ives "Three Places in New England" and the Sibelius Violin Concerto. One a hit, the other the evening's disappointment.

Maestro Stern loves Ives and has long been a champion of his music. From this stellar performance, we can only hope for more; the 3rd Symphony perhaps?

The many ethereal and mystic passages of “The Saint-Gaudens in Boston Commons,” and the “Housatonic at Stockbridge” were both clear yet subtly shrouded. All the lines and elements could be discerned yet were blended into the cloud of sound Ives intended. “Putnam’s Camp” was perfectly noisy with a remarkable controlled rowdiness. The orchestra was well up to the demands of the piece. A surprisingly great performance that had many in the audience reassessing their opinion of Ives.

Hungarian violinist Barnabas Kelemen was the soloist in the Sibelius Violin Concerto. He is certainly technically gifted and a very visceral performer. Sadly, he showed little understanding of this most romantic and passionate of concertos. His tone was a too muscular and tended to emphasize the wrong notes in a phrase with accents that were not there in the score. The slow movement came off best. The finale was ok, but Keleman completely blew off the strange yet wonderful passage in harmonics, burying it in the orchestral texture. Tempi were spot on but intonation was questionable in several passages. The orchestra seemed a little overwhelmed by it all. The audience for the most part loved him, he certainly caught the ladies' attention and was posing with gaggles of young female fans for photographs at intermission. A pretty face does not a virtuoso make.

The audience called him back for an encore, the opening movement of Bach's Sonata #1 for violin solo. Played with lots of showmanship and lukewarm musical passion.

The Kansas City Symphony continues to improve with every performance. Even the Sibelius was good, I just love the piece so much that I think I am a bit over critical. Even on a cold evening with heavy snow falling, the hall was packed. Friday was sold out, clear testimony to where the orchestra is and where it is going.

Next week: 2 separate concerts featuring Yo-Yo Ma. That would never had occurred a few years ago.

Felix the Oscar

From my post a few days ago, I think it is obvious that Puggles, Queen of All Pugs, Etc, has a special place in the hierarchy of "animals I have loved". The adored creature next in line is a little different. He had no legs or fur at all. Despite that, he was a treasured member of my family for years and deserves to be honored.

His name was Felix. No, not a cat, but Felix the Oscar. Clever of me, wasn't it?














Oscars (or Astronotus Ocellatus)are large ciclid fish commonly found in South America - Amazon and Orinoco River Basins - Argentina, Brazil, Colombia, French Guiana, Paraguay, Peru, Uruguay, and Venezuela. They are popular for aquarium hobbyists and are known to be a highly intelligent, observant fish. Good size for aquarium fish, they get to be about 12-14 in long and weigh 3-4 lbs. The picture above is of course not Felix, I have a picture or two of him, but taken in the pre-digital days and thus not on line anywhere.

I got Felix as a small fry and watched him grow, and grow and grow, until he needed his own 55 gallon tank with his friend the Mentally Retarded Catfish (MRC). MRC would stand for days on its head in the corner, until poked. It would then thrash around and disappear, only to reappear a few days later, on its head in the corner. MRC eventually disappeared totally, I wonder if Felix ate him, finally having enough of his silliness.

Felix was about 14 in long, but I never weighed him. Suffice to say, whenever he needed to be moved, a large bucket was necessary.

He lived with me in Jefferson City, moved with me to Grain Valley, stayed with my sister in Illinois when I was in Chicago and then to St Louis with me. He was nothing else but a well traveled fellow. Through all that, a bout with "hole in the head disease", a common affliction with Oscars, a nutsoid neighbor in Grain Valley who fed him a whole 10 lbs of food while I was away one time and thus turned his water into cornmeal, and my sometimes neglectful attitude, Felix lived and prospered.

As I mentioned, Oscars are observant and very smart. I taught him as a smaller fellow to jump out of his tank and catch his food. He would spot you as you passed by and enjoyed following you. If you were in the same room, he would make sure you were well observed. He caught everyone's attention. Once I brought a fellow home with me and as we made our way passionately back to the bedroom we passed through my den where Felix lived. As this fellow was doing things to me that my modesty will not allow me to write :), he caught sight of Felix staring at him menacingly. Briefly startled, he exclaimed "damn that is a big fish". He unfortunately was referring to Felix.

He also loved to dance.

As one can imagine, a dancing fish is quite a rarity. If you went up to his tank and started swaying back and forth he would follow your movements, faster and faster until he broke into a boogie that rivaled anything on Saturday Night Fever. A towel was usually in order to pick up the sloshed around water.

When I left St Louis, my life was in turmoil. I was facing another move, little money and a job I knew was not going to last long. Felix was then around 11 years old and I was not sure he could stand another move. I made the hard decision to take him to the local aquarium shop and give him to them. They promised to keep him and not kill him but set him up in a nice tank. They had never seen him and were impressed by his size and personality when he arrived. He got a nice new home. I visited the shop a year or so later and they said he was with an Oscar enthusiast they knew in a 500 gallon tank with some other fish and was still well. He was at least 12-13 by then. That is not uncommon.

I miss Felix, he was one of a kind. Occasionally I think about getting another tank and an Oscar. But my little space here is pretty crowded as it is. I don't know where I'd put one.

Felix, you were special. Here's to you my friend! Happy swimming.

The Secret of Making Men Happy

This revelation works for women, gay boys and anyone trying to please the man in their life:

Men have two states of being:

Hungry

&

Horny

If you see your man without an erection, make him a sandwich.

Man's Best Friend

We hopped in the Queen Mary and after settling in, headed east out of town. No, it was not an escape, Puggles had a vet appointment. Her skin allergies were out of hand and she was biting and scratching something terrible. She had a rubbed a few places raw, having found that an unused cable TV outlet was the perfect height to reach the spot above her tail. She would wiggle her butt against it and just "ooooowwwww ooooooowwwrop" away as it relieved the itch.

I take her about 15 miles away and pass a ton of vet hospitals because I trust this vet with her life. She has been going there since she was a tiny pup, they know her and she knows them. Most dogs howl and resist going to the vet. Puggles bolts from the car and strains at her leash to get in, scratching at the door... come on!! She bursts in, whole body wiggling; she just can't wag her tail enthusiastically enough. "I am here!, Love me, Pet me!, Where are the treats!!!??"

She gets her shot, and her glands expressed and she is much happier. As he looks at her, Dr B wants to do a dental. Her almost 8 yr old teeth need attention. I resist as it involves putting her under anesthesia and I hate that. Pugs have been known to be difficult to bring out of anesthesia. What do I do? Risk that, or have her in pain over some bad teeth. As much as I trust Dr B, hell he has been a vet for 37 years, I think I'll get a second opinion.

I like dogs more than most people. Friendly, loyal, caring, trusting, loving unconditionally, I have never been screwed over by a dog. They may pee on your rug (usually that is your fault for not taking them out) but they never stab your back. You know where you stand with them. Be a dog's master and protector, and you have a friend for life. Feed them, a warm place to sleep, a treat or 20, a few toys, they are content.

Dogs know us. Scientists suspect that the dog-human relationship goes back to pre-history. Wolf remains have been found with human remains dating from 400,000 years ago. Domestication of dogs took place 17-14,000 years ago. Thus they are sensitive to our moods and feelings, adapt to our schedules and gleefully join us in our celebrations and feasting.

Last night, I had fit of coughing and restlessness at about 3AM. As I hacked and tossed, cursed and wailed, Puggles lay beside me. Always looking at me with those dark big eyes. When I would settle, I'd get a couple of pugkisses. "You ok daddy??" she'd seem to say. Her velvet ears would get scratched and tummy rubbed. When I would drift off, she'd lay and softly snore and make her long, contented snort-sigh (something only a pug can do) to let me know all is relaxed and well.

I have not decided about her teeth. It seems to be a no-brainer to get her teeth fixed. But the anxiety, the questions, the stark fear; what would I do with out her? It would send my fragile mental health into a tail spin. She is more than a dog, she is my soul mate. My baby, my rock. We'll have to think long and hard about that one.

She is on her throne right now, a leather recliner with a green velvet cushion for her to lay upon. A passing barking dog has been dispatched with a few growls, get thee gone! Snoring softly, waiting to see if I am going to get up from the desk and go anywhere near food.

My friend.

Bushwhacking of America Continues

Subtle and sly, barely noticed by the media (liberal bias my ass) Bush and his Administration run rampant through the system, dismantling anything that displeases the emperor.

Bush Fires Cummins in Midst of Investigation

It adds up, we can't have the son of one of the most important Republican Leaders being investigated for political misconduct can we?? Only the Democrats do that, because they sympathize with child rapists, baby killers and "turrists".

I firmly believe now that Blunt was up to no good and would have been indicted if the investigation was handled properly.

Hypocrisy makes me sick.

An Update

It is 12 degrees here in KC, MO right now, wind chill makes it seem like 4 degrees. And guess what, the Liberty Tax man is still dressed as Miss Liberty (same fellow as last week, he must have done something really bad) and still waving at cars as they pass. See the link below for the original story.

I think I'll keep my job, thank you.

Humiliating Jobs

The Town Car Lives On

Thank goodness, I did not want to drive an orphan. After much speculation and rumor, Ford Motor Company announced that it was continuing production of the Lincoln Town Car at least for 2007.

As one can imagine, sales of the big girl are down as big luxury cars slip out of vogue. If you want big luxury now, you get a big SUV. Yes, a luxo-truck. I can't really accept that, but I guess most of the big spenders do. Smaller "sport-lux" cars like the BMW, Lexus, Mercedes-Benz, and Cadillac CTS are much more popular today. The Town Car remains alone in its perch. A rear wheel drive anachronism, long in the tooth. A car for the 60-death crowd.

Why the turn around? Simple. Ford needed cash. The Town Car, despite all the critical ranting and pooh-poohing, is very profitable. The design dates back in many ways to 1979, the body since 2000. The engine has been around since 1991. She is paid for in other words, every sale is high profit.

A second reason came from the limo makers. The Town Car is still the prime source for limo conversions and both the standard size and long production versions are popular for airport livery service.

That in itself has created a proverbial catch-22 situation; buyers of luxury autos don't want to see their prized possessions plying the streets as taxis and cars for hire. Sales to the public dropped, but the limo market carried on.

Whatever the reason, the Town Car marches on. She is going to be built in Canada now, as Ford closes its Wixom, MI plant that was built in the 50s to build the first unit body cars made by Ford. Oddly, the Town Car is almost the last body on frame built car in the US. While everyone else went unit, the Town Car went back to body on frame to ensure quiet and smoothness.

While I do not own a new Town Car, the Queen Mary, my 1988 cousin (as mentioned, she shares a lot with the 2007 version) carries me where I want in smooth, reliable and luxurious fashion. I would not trade her ride and seats for anything. She is getting a bit rough, but in her sleek straight lines, she still exudes a sense of elegance.

Long may she live, and her new cousins too!

Boy-Gov Is Still At It

It has been a long time since this blog has ragged on Missouri's pathetic excuse of a Governor, Mattie "daddy's boy" Blunt. But that is not to assume there has not been fodder for ragging. Blunt continues to be one of the most unpopular governors in the country, with 60% of the electorate rating him as poor. But some political wags are surprised at this.

Well, Pato has the answer for them, Boy-gov is not popular because he is doing a horrible job. His agenda is not his constituent's agenda, it is 100% pro-business, pro-whatever Repub agenda is, and the same damn the torpedoes approach that Bush has used to destroy America's reputation.

Blunt has saved money for the state but instead of cutting waste, he cut programs that hurt people. Gutting Medicaid, forcing more people into going to Emergency rooms or nursing homes because home care is not available, I question whether he is actually saving taxpayer dollars, especially in the Medicaid area. Patients, denied Medicaid, started using hospital emergency departments at a greater cost to the state. By slashing so deep, Missosuri also missed out on Federal matching funds for Medicaid. And you know the Gov and family never missed a Doctor appointment.

Blunt and his Republican clones are happy to dispense with their responsibilities as tax payers and spend our money instead. They are all for cutting taxes, their taxes. That is why their tax cuts are always higher while middle and low wage earners are left to pick up the tab.

Patronage jobs and cronyism are at an all time high in a state system that for years was the model of a merit system. Anyone care that we are paying the salaries of his friends while they do nothing? Morale for state employees is at an all time low. Efficiency in state government has been replaced with favors and back slapping for those who bow to the boss.

He even has the balls to entertain delusions of grandeur about being ultra-right wing Mitt Romney's VP candidate. I'd definitely move out of this sinking ship of country then.

Brazenly defying law, appointing cronies, pushing his own agenda despite lack of support from the people (they just get in the way, anyway), being totally stupid... that is the way to be popular, with your clique of Republican fat cats.

The rest of us can't wait to wave bye-bye!

Aborted Plans

Well, so much for the proverbial plans of mice and men.... I was supposed to make a flying trip to Dallas today for a party tonight. When I went to Dallas in October to sing with the Turtle Creek Chorale and the Heartland Men's Chorus joint concert, Michael and I stayed with his friend Pat. A feisty and funny lady, she was celebrating her 85th birthday in style at a country club, catered dinner and all.

Everything co operated but the weather. Michael went down Friday and I was going to join him this PM for the 7Pm party. Michael called this AM and told me the party was canceled as Dallas was getting some freezing rain. We had a bit too but I was planning to head out. Southwest Airlines data showed the flight as leaving and arriving on time. Then it was delayed and then finally canceled. Poor Michael, he is stuck there, but he used to live there so I am sure he'll find something to do.

As for me, I am going to relax, not do much and try to get rid of the cough and cold that has been annoying me. Stay in, watch the snow, and vegetate.

Sounds good to me.

Free Ride Is Over, Next Sucker Please...

Transamerica Occidental Life Insurance Co.is pulling up stakes in Kansas City and shifting 500 positions to Cedar Rapids, Iowa. About 50 underwriting and marketing employees will stay in Kansas City after the move is completed, expected by the end of 2007.

“Our companies continually evaluate their business models and explore ways to improve operating efficiencies,” Brenda Clancy, executive vice president and chief operating officer, said in a release. “By consolidating duplicated functions, we will enhance economies of scale, facilitate improved speed to market for new products and simplify our operating structure. Once the consolidation is complete, we anticipate annual savings of $15 million to $20 million.”

BULLSHIT!

Their tax free ride at the expense of the citizens runs out shortly, they are just going somewhere else to get a free ride.

Cities give away the farm to companies to build their headquarters and such in their community. TIFs, and incentives are the norm. Since Corporate America only cares about its bottom line, they love to play the blackmail game and squeeze all they can out of a community. When the juice is out of the orange, they toss it aside and woo some other sucker.

Think twice cities when the big boys come calling, and remember what you learned in Kindergarten, if it looks too good to be true, it usually is.

A Lily For Lily

Pato notes the passing of Yvonne De Carlo, yes Lily Munster has passed on at the age of 84. Well, Yvonne De Carlo may have, but Lily is immortal.

De Carlo got her start in B-movie westerns and desert locale epics where she often played a dance hall girl or a seductive oriental Salome. For many years, Ms De Carlo was considered one of the most beautiful women in the world. For us Boomers, she will always be known as Lily Munster from the 1964-1966 TV series "The Munsters." Lily, the vampire mom, kept charge of her gentle Frankenstein of a husband, Herman, and Grandpa as Dracula's brother.

The Munsters lasted only two seasons, but lives on in syndication to this day. In an article, De Carlo commented about The Munsters: "It meant security. It gave me a new, young audience I wouldn't have had otherwise. It made me `hot' again, which I wasn't for a while."

While enjoying The Munsters as a kid, I today think the character of Morticia played by Carolyn Jones in "The Addams Family" was the definitive monster-mom of the era.

Nonetheless, here is a lily for Lily Munster...where ever she has gone.

Humiliating Jobs

I own a TV and have super digital (0r whatever they call it) service with like 789 channels of drivel. Of all that, I watch basically one, the Weather Channel, as it is the only consistently relevant program. Since the building pays for the cable, I take advantage of it, as there might be something fun now and then on one of the channels.

So, occasionally, boredom leads me to channel surf. QVC, The Cartoon Channel, Food Network (not worth a damn now since they no longer show Japanese Iron Chef), all pass by the clicker. What a wasteland, shades of AM radio.

I did see on some channel a show called Dirty Jobs. Not sure which channel it was on but the concept of spending an hour with a sewer worker or a slaughter house janitor left me cold. I went to bed.

But that chance encounter inspired me. I think there should be a show called "Humiliating Jobs". Jobs that make people look and act absolutely ridiculous. And I have a perfect candidate: The person dressed as the Statue of Liberty for Liberty Tax Service.

These must be the new hires, or the fuck-ups. I can't imagine anyone willingly doing it. All kinds of weather, day and evening, waving, looking foolish. Maybe they need the money, maybe they have to do it or get fired. In any case, I feel for these schleps, and worry about the sanity of those doing it willingly. Has there been an escape from the loony bin?

I was heading down 39th street and past a newly opened office of the company. There stood Miss Liberty ( never knew she was a 20-something black man) waving and dancing. As I passed she leaned over and waved at me and gave me a thumbs up. Should I wave.... or hope she quietly disappears?

One thing for sure, If they think I am going to entrust my taxes to someone who dresses in poor Miss Liberty drag, they have another think coming.

37 Ideas For GW Bush T-shirts

Some potential George W Bush T-shirt slogans:

1) (On an infant's shirt): Already smarter than Bush.

2) 1/20/09: End of an Error

3) That's OK, I Wasn't Using My Civil Liberties Anyway

4) Let's Fix Democracy in This Country First

5) If You Want a Nation Ruled By Religion, Move to Iran

6) Bush. Like a Rock. Only Dumber.

7) You Can't Be Pro-War And Pro-Life At The Same Time

8) Be nice to the USA or we'll bring "democracy" to YOUR country!

9) Of Course It Hurts: You're Getting Screwed by an Elephant

10) Hey, Bush Supporters: Embarrassed Yet?

11) George Bush: Creating the Terrorists Our Kids Will Have to Fight

12) Impeachment: It's Not Just for having sex Anymore

13) Would someone PLEASE give Bush a blow job so we can start the impeachment?

14) America : One Nation, Under Surveillance

15) They Call Him "W" So He Can Spell It

16) Which God Do You Kill For?

17) Cheney/Satan '08

18) Jail to the Chief

19) Who Would Jesus Torture?

20) No, Seriously, Why Did We Invade??

21) Bush: God's Way of Proving Intelligent Design is Full Of Crap

22) Bad president! No Banana.

23) We Need a President Who's Fluent In At Least One Language

24) We're Making Enemies Faster Than We Can Kill Them

25) "Yeehaw!" is not a foreign policy

26) Rich Man's War, Poor Man's Blood

27) Is It Vietnam Yet?

28) Bush Doesn't Care About White People, Either

29) Where Are We Going? And Why Are We In This Handbasket?

30) You Elected Him. You Deserve Him.

31) You can't spell "WAR" without Dubya

32) Impeach Cheney First

33) A President's IQ should be THREE digits.

34) When Bush Took Office, Gas Was $1.26

35) The Republican Party: Our Bridge to the 11th Century

36) 2004: Embarrassed 2005: Horrified 2006: Terrified

37) If you can read this, you're not the President.

Happy Anniversary Pato News!

One year ago today, I started Pato News. Being a long time journal keeper, the thought of an online journal was fascinating to me. I had heard of bloggers and blogging, and thought it was the domain of the computer geeks and junkies. Being a junkie but far from an expert in computers, I figured it was beyond my capabilities.

I explored a bit and heard about Livejournal.com. So I started a Livejournal page. I was not real consistent in my posting and was at a low point in my life. I had left St Louis, pretty broke and facing the prospect that nearing 50, I was washed up as a Human Resource manager. Jobs, good ones, were scarce and went to the young and aggressive. I was old and burnt out.

My friend Connie had a friend and former colleague that worked for a company that ran 12 unit assisted living facilities. They needed live in managers, room and board provided plus a salary. I packed up to Maryville and did that until I almost went loony. My now defunct Livejournal entries chronicled that.

Seeking a more organized and functional format, I stumbled upon Xanga and created a Xanga blog for a while. That went pretty well until I realized Xanga was populated by creepy little teenagers and their nonsense. When a comment was left on a post about John Cage's composition "As Slow as Possible" saying "UR queer. Xanga is for teans" (sic), I realized it was time to move on.

So, on January 8, 2006, I created Pato News here on Blogspot. I have been pleased with the service and thrilled to have so many readers. I am amazed at how fast posts get referenced on Google and on other search engines. The vast majority of readers are led to Pato News through a search for something. I hope they find what they are looking for!

Blogging is good mental exercise and a good discipline. I posted something on 75% of the days available (276/365) in 2006. I am at the same pace in 2007.

Thanks to everyone who has read and visited, all 2500 or so of you. Look forward to more!

Inherit the Wind

“He that troubles his own house shall inherit the wind:
and the fool shall be servant to the wise of heart”
Proverbs 11:29

Thus is the inspiration for the title of one of the most important and oft performed American plays. It is also a wonderful 1960 movie starring Spencer Tracy, Fredric March and Gene Kelly. Broadcast last night on our local PBS station, I was struck by the continuing relevance of the work. Intolerance and ignorance, blind ambition, and blind following of a fundamentalist dogma are exposed as being as the evils they are, leading to life destroying persecution.

Written by Jerome Lawrence and Robert Edwin Lee (who also did “Auntie Mame”), Inherit the Wind is a fictionalized account of the 1925 Scopes "Monkey Trial" which resulted in Scopes' conviction for teaching Darwin's theory of evolution to a high school science class. Tennessee state law at that time that mandated the teaching of creationism in high school science; sound familiar residents of Kansas???

The play and movie’s characters Matthew Harrison Brady, Henry Drummond, Bertram Cates and E.K. Hornbeck correspond respectively to the historical figures William Jennings Bryan, Clarence Darrow, John Scopes, and H.L. Mencken, of the Scopes Trial.

Strangely enough, the play and subsequent movie were not intended as a docu-drama about the Scopes trial, but as an indictment of the Mc Carthy era, which when the play was written, had gripped the nation. Matthew Brady was more Joseph Mc Carthy than William Jennings Bryan.

Unfortunately, a long tradition of misinterpretation has cast Inherit the Wind as a reasonably true account of the 1925 trial. By 1955, few remembered the Scopes Trial and it was rarely mentioned in texts or reference works. With the overwhelming success of the play (it is highly possible that every high school drama department has performed the play at one time or another) and movie, and few around to refute it, the impression was made that Inherit the Wind was based in fact. For example, I always remembered (probably from seeing the play) that during the trial, the cool and methodical Darrow made the blustering Bryan look foolish and ignorant.

Far from the truth.

Scopes himself was a willing participant in the whole affair, and was never in danger of being imprisoned or lynched by angry, hymn singing crowds. Scopes was persuaded by a group of local businessmen to challenge the law after hearing that the ACLU wanted a test case to challenge the law. The state made the teachers at the time use a particular text and that text included reference to evolution. One of the intents was to expose this paradox and show that the state was mandating that teachers break the law. Scopes himself later claimed that he never actually taught the section on evolution to this class.

As for the climactic scene where Brady tries to read his hellfire and brimstone remarks to the jury, even after Scopes had been found guilty, and falls down dead; none of that took place in the trial. However, Brady's final antics and hysterical rant in the courtroom has a counterpart in McCarthy's last Army-McCarthy Hearing on June 17^th, 1954 when Mc Carthy’s similar fit of rage abruptly ended his witch hunt. That event would have been fresh on the minds of those who saw the play and movie in the late 50’s.

It is a given fact that sometimes true events need embellishment for the sake of stage and screen drama. The Scopes trial was more than likely a bland affair, as most trials are. Inherit the Wind may take liberties with the absolute facts, but its themes of tolerance, bigotry, hysteria, freedom of thought and expression and separation of church and state resonate even today. Lawrence and Lee, in their introduction to the play stated, “It might have been yesterday. It could be tomorrow."

Thus Inherit the Wind, this masterpiece of stage and screen, warns of the dangers inherent in repeating the wrongs of the past, which, as we have seen, haunt us still if we are not willing to be vigilant.

(As a total aside from all of this, the movie has some other interesting bits of trivia. The young Leslie Uggams performs the opening and closing vocals, Dick York played "Bert Cates" the John Scopes based character, York is more famous as the first Darrin on Bewitched and his subsequent resignation from the show due a painful back injury and addiction to painkillers. Norman Fell, immortal as Mr Roper from "Three's Company" played a reporter. Florence Eldridge gets a whole screen credit page to herself. Who??, M and I asked. She was an actress with many stage and film credits from the 30's and Fredric March's wife.)

Saturday Pancake Musings

Well, I decided not to give up pancakes...yet. I have not been able to snag a new appointment to get my BP and blood sugar checked. So Ignorance is bliss and I am having my Saturday pancakes this weekend.

1) The "Injustice System" rolls on. A man was convicted of killing a member of the KC Symphony and gets 25 years. But in St Louis, a man gets 30 years for sexual exploitation of a minor. Kid is messed up for sure, but not dead. In Texas, 2 men got 15 years for the murder and beating of a gay man and are soon to be released. Since they were citizens of Mexico, they are also scheduled to be released. But immigrant groups are fighting their deportations.

I don't get it. Sex is worse than murder and a musician is worth more than a gay man??

2) A lively discussion has begun over at PugVillage on the topic of eating shrimp tails. I admitted my love of eating the whole shrimp, tail, shell and all. It is less wasteful for one thing, and less time consuming. I enjoy the crunchiness as well. Any other shrimp tail eaters here??

3) I want to spend some time at this beach. The famous (among airplane spotters) Mahalo Beach just at the end of the runway to Princess Juliana Airport in St Maarten. Reach out and touch someone indeed! Air France Landing.

4) My friend Barb called yesterday and wanted to know if I wanted to go with her to see the Smothers Brothers. I thought one of them had died; but no, both are still up and kicking. They perform all over the country, doing a lot of casino shows. We are seeing them in Topeka, since their appearance in KC is at a casino and both Barb and I hate casinos. I fondly remember them from the 60s and even vaguely remember the battle they had with CBS over censorship of their show. Wikipedia has a great review of this controversy. CBS fired them, they became heros and obviously have done quite well. Show is March 4th.

5) I have not taken my Christmas tree down yet. I guess it is about time. I am more lazy than anything else about it.

6) Pancakes were extra good today!

A Tribute To Jay

This is an email I got from my friend Greg about his neighbor's dog Jay. Jay succumbed to the ravages of doggie old age this past weekend, he was about 18. Mary is a girlfriend of David's. Rest in peace Jay. ~ Pato

A Tribute to Baby Jay

Although all outward appearances would lead one to believe that Jay was a dog, those of us who were blessed to have the chance to spend time with him remember him as a human.. a loving companion.. a fierce ally in battle.. a loyal friend.. and as stubborn as they come. He was a protector, the ruler of the roost, and absolutely devoted to his daddy and Bobby. Yet when he wasn't busy protecting his fort or family, he was patiently waiting for food.. whether it was the ritual leftovers given to him on a plate after a meal, stray crumbs on the floor, Nutter Butters that left his mouth watering as soon as the package was opened, or the simple, yet obvious motion of laying down in front of his food bowl to let you know that it was time for you to feed him.. Pigs ears would disappear within seconds, though unlike the rest of the food that was given to him, he would actually chew on as opposed to swallowing whole. And not to mention the LIVE variety of tasty treats for Jay.. snakes, possums, rodents, and the occasional cat or two. Very few cats consider themselves lucky to have known Jay..and those are the ones that he liked and allowed to live.

He was the leader of the pack in the neighborhood. Walking him was often time consuming, for he had to sniff out each blade of grass that another dog left his mark on for what seemed like hours, as if he was deciphering the other dog's DNA, their personal history, criminal convictions, etc...and of course, he would HAVE to leave his own mark.. slowly making his way around the block.. back to the house..(but not before leaving a present in a neighbor's yard, which of course HE was never yelled at for...). After such rigorous exercise, Jay would have to rest...mostly in the spots that YOU wanted to rest in..and he would lay there, flat on his back, arms and legs sprawled out. Bedtime was always an experience, and I would usually end up smashed against the wall, with one of his legs or arms digging into my side..and he had to have his "warmies"... in other words, he was under the blanket with us as well, nudging my bare skin with his enormous, cold, wet nose from time to time, stretching his legs and arms across me, as if to let me know that I was taking up "HIS" space..but when we finally decided that three was a crowd in bed (which took MUCH pleading and begging to David on that note..) and he was left to sleep on his bed on the floor, he would make sure to let us know that "JAY" and "SLEEP" and "FLOOR" was not acceptable... we would beg him off the bed with food, sell our souls to the devil, whatever it took..he would pretend to be in a "coma", unresponsive to our pleas..or mine, at least.. and when he would finally roll off the bed as if it was killing him to move, he would then flash his "puppy dog eyes" to elicit a sympathetic response.

Jay was one of a kind.. I can picture him now.. lying out in the front yard or on the sidewalk, watching the world go by, as if contemplating the deeper meaning of life. Many feared him, but those who knew him realize what a truly amazing and special dog he was. I was always waiting for him to start talking, for if any dog could manage that, it would have been Baby Jay. He never ceased to amaze me, and the stories David would tell about his earlier years reaffirm the fact that he was special from the beginning. My only comfort now is knowing that he is off in his "heaven", young and vibrant, chasing anything smaller than him that moves..and I'm sure he has an unlimited supply Nutter Butters.. and a king sized bed.. and he knows that he is loved by so many. I will miss you Jay. Love, Mary

I'll be home For Christmas

I'll be home for Christmas
You can count on me
Please have snow and mistletoe
And presents on the tree

Christmas eve will find me
Where the love light gleams
I'll be home for Christmas
If only in my dreams
1943, by Walter Kent (music) and James Gannon (words)

....as the old song goes.

I went home again this past Christmas, as I always do. No dream required. I have been in Kansas City since 1997 and have never spent a Christmas Day or Christmas Eve here. Without fail, I have went back to Decatur; rain, snow, sleet, whatever thrown at me has never stopped me.

I am lucky in a way; my sister still owns and lives in the house I grew up in, I was about 4 when we moved to the new suburban house from the smaller house in the city. I don't remember the first house much, just a few fuzzy memories of my mom and the neighbors interacting.

My sister is older than I, almost a different generation than me. For years we were strangers, but with mom and dad gone and an extended family that is nowhere near close (I have aunts and cousins I have not seen in years) we are all we have. My kids are grown now and have their own agendas, Christmas at Dad's is unthinkable to them as it was for me at that age. They'll come around someday.

Christmas at home is far from exciting. We eat, Donna watches her omnipresent TV, I bitch at all the junk she collects, she eats more and shops more. We go to the Midden's on Christmas Eve, despite the fact that Dee is frail and Bob is in a nursing home. Wine and beer has been replaced with diet soda and tea. I have went over there for as long as I can remember. Dee's cooking is suspect, but she never fails to have a spread. She still gives everyone a tacky present, but her heart is 100% gold.

Donna and I are lousy present givers. We always know what each of us got each other. Makes it easy but it takes the drama out of it. Sometimes the gifts are are still in the sack from the store. I am a lousy wrapper, so it takes some of the anxiety out of it.

Puggles always comes along. She likes visiting Aunt Donna, lots of yard to explore and a neighborhood safe to walk in. Donna professes to be annoyed by her, but I think she secretly adores her. For Puggles, any one who lounges on a couch is the top, so she thinks Aunt Donna is a goddess.

Home is getting shabby. The house needs some work. It, like us, is getting old. Neither of us have the money to sink into the place. We replace as needed, like the roof and the Air conditioner and the tree trim. The big ice storm last month did a number on all the trees and knocked down my apple tree I planted in about 1966-67. But despite all, she still stands, many of the same neighbors are there, the woods I loved to explore still beckons, and I still have a key. I have someplace I can always go. Not being homeless is a great feeling.

It's a bird....It's a plane...no wait...

Employees at Chicago’s O’Hare International Airport insist they observed a UFO hovering over the airport for several minutes on November 7^th , 2006. It quickly disappeared, leaving a visible hole in the clouds.

Was it a Martian spaceship, a weather balloon or a top-secret military plane? Maybe it was a lost glider or simply a reflection?

Airport officials are doing a Sgt Schultz routine and not talking about the event. The Federal Aviation Administration admits its air traffic control tower at O'Hare did receive a call from a United Airlines employee asking if controllers had spotted a mysterious elliptical object hovering over Concourse C of the United terminal. The FAA reported that none of its controllers or the airport radar noticed anything extraordinary, or extra-terrestrial for that matter. The FAA is not concerned at all and dismisses any alleged sighting as a "weather phenomenon". But those who claim they saw it are sticking to their story, one poor soul was so distraught over the whole affair and "experienced some religious issues" over it, a fellow employee reported.

It was reported that the saucer appeared about 4:30PM. Everyone who saw it said the object was dark gray, elliptical and easily seen . No one seemed to agree on the size of the thing, with estimates ranging from 6 feet to 24 feet in diameter. Some said it looked like a rotating Frisbee, while others said it did not appear to be spinning. All agreed the object hovered noiselessly and vanished into the cloud cover.

I think the damn thing was frustrated over no available landing slots and no gates open at the terminal. Can you imagine, we are about to make first contact and the damn airport is at capacity? What could the Martians do but turn around and go home. Certainly the aliens were not happy about diverting to Milwaukee or Rockford. Lucky they didn't use a death ray.

Maybe this will spur on development of a new airport for Chicago.

Inspired

When I ask Classical Music lovers to name a work that moves them emotionally, spiritually and intellectually I frequently get the following responses:

Beethoven 9^th Symphony

Mozart Requiem

Bach Magnificat

Bach’s St Matthew Passion

Beethoven Missa Solemnis

Mahler 9^th Symphony

Sometimes an opera like “La Boheme” or “Madame Butterfly” or a specific aria is mentioned. All are incredible masterpieces and worthy of the honor. All are monumental in scale and in forces, with large orchestras, choral parts, and a religious program weaving a common thread.

However, to my ears and mind, a work maybe not smaller in length but smaller in forces never fails to have the same effect. A work for a solo instrument that languished in obscurity for a considerable time yet is as inspiring as any of the works usually mentioned.

Schubert Sonata for Piano in Bb Major D 960.

Listen to it. Hear the pathos, the maturity and confidence of the composer in what was tragically the last year of his short life, the series of prayers for peace and healing with meditations both sacred and profane. There is an almost relentless force-of-nature-like forward motion in the opening “Molto Moderato” movement, even as it begins with a profound, yet simple prayer. The more turbulent center section takes you on a life journey, with all the highs and lows life offers. The opening prayer's return at the end is a meditation on serenity and enlightenment.

The following “Andante sostenuto” movement is far removed from flashy virtuosity. Some hear a soft, peaceful lullaby or a simple accompaniment and a hymn-like melody. I hear a profound meditation on the acceptance of fate. I keep coming back to enlightenment, as if Schubert had a revelation of his life's purpose and that his work was done. In the slightly faster center section of the movement, I hear the restrained joy of someone expressing “yes, I have found it, this is perfection, and I have found my soul.” Yet moments of fear and insecurity creep in now and then. Simply the most incredible and emotionally complex 10 minutes in music.

In the short (around 4 minutes) “Allegro Vivace Con Delicatezza”, I hear a mercurial and witty celebration. Far from flashy, the intermezzo begins the ascent from the mood of deep meditation to the more lighthearted exploration of joy and contentment. The final “Allegro ma non troppo” has a slightly ironic joy and wit ultimately dispelling the gloom of the first two movements.

There are many wonderful performances of this marvel of music. Brendel, Leif Ove Andsnes, and my piano hero Leon Fleisher on his new Vanguard CD “Two Hands”.

Any of these will provide you with an experience that will enrich you and one you will not forget.

Saturday Pancake Musings: New Year's Weekend

Well, as far as I know, I just had my last pancakes for the year. Maybe for a while too. My Dr. says I have high blood pressure and blood sugar. Unfortunately, the sore shoulder that I went to him for still hurts. I guess I have to go back and fight all over again. He was more worried about the blood stuff, I am tired of my sore shoulder. It is my body, I know what I need!

On to Pancake Musings:

1) Saddam was hung yesterday eve our time, early morning Iraq time. While I abhor his brutality, I am 1000% against State sanctioned murder, as the death penalty is. Would it not be just to have him rot away, broken and remembering all his misdeeds? Why make a martyr of him? But this was a decision for the Iraqis and I guess most are pleased.

2) I guess I will not be seeing Yo-Yo Ma when he comes to town. Tix are gone, not even the Maestro can save me. Oh well. Seeming like it is sour grapes, his programs (Haydn Cello Concerto and Strauss Don Quixote) were not real adventurous and thus not all that earth shattering. I wanted to hear the Shostakovich 9th more than Ma.

3) I got a blog visitor from "state.Az.us". Turns out it was a referral from my friend Jon's website Jon's Jail Journal. He is, as you might assume, a "guest" of the Arizona Department of Corrections. His blog makes wonderful reading. I guess some bureaucrat in Phoenix has nothing better to do than check out his blog and the links to friends. Something sinister about all this actually.

4) Been in a real lousy mood and am tired. Maybe it is the blood stuff noted above.

5) One thing that makes 2007 a Happy New Year is that it is that much closer to getting Bush out of the White House.

So for the year, Pato signing off. See you all next week. Happy Happy!~ Pato

A Forgotten Hero

Pato comes out of vacation to bring you this story about a hero, treated like shit, who was responsible for Gerald R. Ford living to the ripe old age of 93.

We hope everyone had a good Holiday, got lots of presents and survived their travels. ~ Pato

Oliver Sipple 1941-1989

Merry Christmas & Happy 2007

MERRY CHRISTMAS AND HAPPY NEW YEAR FROM DON (PATO) AND HER MAJESTY QUEEN PUGGLES.

We are off to visit my sister and although we will return on Tuesday, Pato is taking a little break from the blog, as are many people this time of year. Look for more Pato around the first of the Year, unless there is something I just have to say.

Take care, safe travels to all and I hope Santa brings you lots of toys!

~ Pato and Puggles

My Buddy Ralph

Ralph is a man of few words. Each one is carefully chosen from his limited repertoire. Be that as it may, Ralph is quite a communicator and actually is one of the more interesting residents of the Towers. Ralph also does not get out much; if he does it is an event of monumental proportions and usually causes quite a stir. But in his simplicity, directness and even touch of mystery, he is most fascinating. A rare visit to Ralph's always makes my day.

Ralph, you see is a parrot. A 27 yr old African Gray. I was going to take a picture of him, but the flash on my camera seems to not want to operate. He is pretty much as his name implies, Gray with a hint of red in his tail and a few white feathers thrown in for contrast. He lives in a big bird cage in Marcia's apartment on the 3rd floor. Soon Ralph (and Marcia too) will be joining us here in the basement of the Towers as she is renovating the dungeon for her new apartment. This is not Ralph but a typical pose of an African Gray.

As I said, he is a bird of few words, mostly "hello", "Come on", "Good boy", "I love you", "Gitch you" (sic) and my favorite "WHOA!!!", which he lustily greets you with upon arrival. He has a vast repertoire of whistles and squawks which are almost more meaningful than his words. The whistles and hellos are usually accompanied by a vigorous bobbing of his head with one eye plastered to the side of the cage, keeping close watch on the visitor. He also loves to clamp on to my hat and try to steal it. Lucky for me, it won't fit through the bars.

Ralph is my entertainment as I wander through the halls on my various rounds. I can tell if Marcia has used the microwave as I hear his "beep beep beep beeeeeeeeeep" which sounds just like the damn thing. If someone has went into the back room off the kitchen, I know that too as he mimics the squeak of the door. He really dislikes people invading his space and making noise. That usually is cause for him to sound the alarm, a fast "beeep beeep beeep beeep" just like a security alarm. He did the same thing when Puggles first came to visit him. "Sound the alarm, I have been invaded!"

Ralph and I have become good buddies. Since Marcia travels out of town occasionally, I am charged with feeding and entertaining Mr. Ralph. We chat, whistle back and forth and communicate in a strangely effective manner. I think he is happy to see me as I am in return. My hearty "hello Ralph" is met with a "WHOA!" or a "Hell-low" the "low" a bit lower in pitch. The combination is effectively casual-friendly. Actually, Ralph's greetings are more sincere and friendly than many of the inhabitants of this place. Says a lot about them, doesn't it?

Computers and Us

My faithful reader Callalilly offered this comment on the 12/18 "From Univac to Memory Sticks" posting. Callalilly made some very valid points. Much like the automobile and the airplane revolutionized our world and relationships plus opened up travel, the computer has revolutionized the way we conduct our daily lives. As the auto and the airplane also brought problems like noise, pollution and safety issues, the computer has also brought problems with it. I am also guilty of knowing more about the lives and stories of people I have never physically met than I am with my own neighbors. I have to drag my now officially fat ass away from the computer to do my daily swim. I should be out doing something but I am updating the blog.

So I offer Callalilly's comments here for your reading as many visitors do not check out the comment section. Thanks Callalilly for the comment. ~ Pato


For years now, computers have been doubling in memory capacity and speed each year while the price has been dropping by half. Truly amazing technologically.

The issue that needs to be looked at more is how all the technology is affecting us. Does it bring people together or separate them further? We communicate with people far away, yet we are too busy to get together with friends across town. Are the things we do with computers healthy for us? We spend hours on our butts in front of the screen, rather than engaging in more physically or mentally challenging activities. Are we really improving our lives? We have access to all sorts of content, but so much of it is very superficial. We can waste so many hours on fascinating but meaningless activities like games and "naughty" stuff. We can spend alot of time pursuing our narrow interests, and we are able to ignore bigger issues that might bring us together with more people.

And of course the computer has brought about a huge upheaval in the job market, resulting in various "winners" and "losers".

From Univac to Memory Sticks

Chuck Gooden loved to talk. Given a chance, he would start up a conversation with King Tut's mummy. He loved to tell his stories, most of which were not real interesting. However he was convinced everyone needed to hear them.

One that was mildly amusing, and even illustrated with some old Polaroids, was the arrival of a Univac computer to the Franklin Life Insurance Co of Springfield, IL. This was in the late 1950s and was a major event. Univac (UNIVersal Automatic Computer) was the first commercial computer made in the US. Only 4o some units were ever made and were a considerable investment for a company. Insurance companies, needing lots of information for billing and processing claims, were a natural market.

According to Chuck, most of the employees got the day off and most of Springfield watched as a fleet of heavy lift helicopters brought the unit to the building. While the workers used fans and open windows to cool in the humid midwest summer, Univac had his own air-conditioned floor. It took the better part of the day and several weeks of pre and post installation work to get Univac ready to go.

Just as a bit of trivia, UNIVAC used 5,200 vacuum tubes weighed 29,000 lbs, and could perform about 1,905 operations per second. The Central Complex (consisting of the processor and memory unit) by itself was 14" by 8 " by 8.5" high . The complete system occupied more than 350 sq ft of floor space.

Fast forward to today. Technology has rocketed forward in the last 50 years. Univac is now a museum piece. Computers are ubiquitous, and even throwaway. I have a 5 year old Dell in the corner that is now obsolete, it is going to be a second computer, much like the once shiny new car is now the second one for the kids, a newer one taking its place in the pecking order.

This whole essay came about as I bought a 1 gigabyte memory stick yesterday when I was out shopping. This little thing, illustrated here, is 1/100,000 or more the size of Univac. But probably holds more memory than Univac could even imagine. A Univac system cost nearly a million dollars (1950 dollars) to buy and even more to install. With only 46 made a Univac owner was in an elite club. A 1 gig memory stick costs $20 give or take and can be bought at Target. 2 gig sticks are also available and I am sure bigger ones are on the way.


The photo above is about life size.

The old tape drive, card reader computers are dead and gone, computer memory is cheap now. Someone without a computer is either a technophobe, lazy or just dirt poor. You just wonder what the computers of 50 years from now will be. Microchips I guess, maybe even inbred in babies. Provided there is a 50 years from now.

Happy Birthday Ludwig

Today is the high holy day for little Schroeder, the piano playing denizen of the "Peanuts" cartoons. Yes it is Beethoven's birthday; good ol' Ludwig Van turns 236 today. We think. His exact birthdate was not recorded, but he was baptized on December 17th so this date has been traditionally celebrated. Some think it was more likely the 15th or even earlier. But since we have no definitive proof, we'll just accept the date as today. Schroeder would approve.



No other composer's music reaches out, grabs you and shakes you quite the way Beethoven's does. He also had an amazing ability to make the most simple passage monumental in its impact. Unlike Mozart, he revolutionized music, took the symphony to new heights and perfected the string quartet and solo sonata.

I haven't decided what to listen to later to honor him, there are plenty of options. I am leaning toward my favorite Symphony the 7th or the incredible String Quartet op 131.

Happy Birthday Ludwig!

We Three Pugs

Her Majesty Puggles, Queen of All Pugs and Supreme Ruler of Alaska, etc, etc. wishes to share her favorite Christmas Carol with her loyal subjects:

We Three Pugs
(To the tune of "We Three Kings")

We three Pugs of Orient are,
Shuffling low, we cannot go far.
Bellies dragging,
Tails a wagging,
Hounding the Milk Bone jar.

O! O!

We love treats and we love hugs.
We love all 'cause we are pugs.
Licking, sneezing, snoring, wheezing,
Guide us to the warmest rugs.

We wish all a Merry Christmas from Puggingham Palace
D and P

The Myth of Lunch

Just like record stores, arctic ice cover, and the Democratic majority in the Senate, lunch time is in peril.

"What's for lunch?" is heard less frequently among the cubes and worker bees in corporate America these days. Most experts agree on one thing, it is not the worker's idea for the most part, it is increased workplace stress, less people to get the job done due to massive layoffs in the last decade and increased competition for the few plum jobs available. At one company only 3% of employees took a full hour for lunch and the vast majority said the 1 hour lunch was a myth. Many workers eat a meal at their desk, many do not eat at all.

Corporate America could care less about employees anymore. They are a liability to be shed like outdated equipment. Cut cut cut, work more, work more, threaten layoffs and closure, cut cut cut, if I don't produce more I'll be fired. No wonder we are all getting stressed out, no wonder depression is at an all time high while health benefits are at an all time low. No wonder lunch break is low on everyone's priority. I think the Roman slaves had it better.

Not having a proper lunch is not healthy for many. Studies have also shown that mistakes increase and productivity lags as blood sugar lowers.

Tell me, worker bees, is you job worth your life and health? Trust me, they don't care about you. Skipping your lunch or working 24/7 won't impress them. Only the "stakeholders" are of concern these days. Take it from someone who knows.

That is why I love my job. I can take lunch, fuck I even take a nap now and then. I don't make the big bucks, but with no debt, I have more money to spend than most do after all the credit cards and insane mortgage and car payments.

Do Pato a favor. Take an hour off each day. See if they notice. See if you feel better.

See if the big bosses go out for lunch.... bet they do.

"What's for lunch?" Not sure yet, I'll probably go to the local deli and find something, or maybe some take out sushi. Then I feel a nap coming on.

Legends

I rarely watch TV anymore. Most of it bores me to tears. "Friends", "Seinfeld", "Will and Grace"...I have not a clue what they are about. Reality shows? Forget them. I watched about 10 minutes of a "Survivor" episode and was bored and mystified at what all the fuss was about.

Give me some 80's prime time soap operas! Yes, I loved "Dynasty" and "Falcon Crest"... "Dallas" was ok, but the former two were top rated for me! Oh the fabulous people, the power, the clothes, the drama, the schemes, the double crossing, the love affairs, did I say drama?. And the wonderful stars, Jane Wyman, John Forsythe, Pamela Sue Martin, Linda Evans, the yummy Al Corley (what happened to him?) and of course the bitch herself, Joan Collins. As a trivia note, he verbal wars between Krystle (Evans) and Alexis (Collins) was one of the first times the word bitch was used on US television. The use of bitch on Dynasty made the use of the word more socially acceptable.

So I was thrilled when "Legends!" was booked to play here in KC this past week. Starring none other than Linda Evans and Joan Collins, in person! A ton of bitch on stage, it must be heaven.

Unfortunately, if it were not for the presence of the two names, this play would not be worth walking across the street to see. It was great seeing the two "Grande Chattes" together on stage. They looked as if time had stood still, great face lifts ladies! Only some slow movements belied the fact that they were no longer spring bitches.

The plot was tailor made for them. An unscrupulous producer wants to cast two old legends of film and stage in a new play. The ladies are notorious rivals. He succeeds in getting them together by lies and promises. Of course both are washed up and broke. Collins has to borrow an apartment to use as a meeting place so to impress Evans.

The rest of the play is not worth mentioning. Of course they meet, banter, bitch, exchange insults as their charade is unraveled, mostly due to their eating some "Alice B. Toklas Brownies (aka Marijuana brownies). They agree to do the show because they are flat broke. The borrowed apartment was to be a scene for a party and everyone is warned that the party is canceled, except Boom-Boom Johnson, the hired Chippendale stripper. He does his dance and leave the stage with nothing but a strategically placed top hat. What he had to do with anything except to enliven the dirge is beyond me. Beefy boy he was, he made the ladies and gay boys happy.

Yes I was disappointed in the play with its silly, pathetic plot. But to see two of my legends at the same time was great. Unfortunately they did not get in a hair-pulling bitch fight in a fountain. That would have made my day

More Random Questions

1. What time is it? 12:02PM

2. What is your full name? Donald Edward Clark

3. What are you most afraid of? Some nut starting a war

4. What is the most recent movie that you have seen in a theater? “The Queen”

5.Have you ever seen a ghost? no.

6. Where were you born? Decatur, Il

7. Ever been to Alaska? no

8. Ever been toilet papering? no

9. Loved someone so much it made you cry? Yes

10. Been in a serious car accident? no

11 Do you plan to have any more Children? no

12. Favorite day of the week? Wednesday, I have a happy hour with friends that night.

13. Favorite Restaurant? Cafe Trio

14. Favorite Flower? Iris

15. Favorite color? blue

16. Favorite sport to watch? None, really

17. Favorite Drinks? Diet coke, alcohol: gin and tonic

18. Favorite Ice Cream? vanilla but I really love Murray's Bailey's Irish Creme with real Bailey's!

19. Favorite fast food restaurant ? Arby’s

20. What color is your bedroom carpet? none

21. How many times did you fail your driver's test? none

22. Before this one, from whom did you get your last e-mail? Ann Dupont

23. What do you do when you are bored? Serf the net

24. Bedtime? after midnight.

25. Who will respond to this e-mail the quickest? Not sending it on

26. Who is the person you sent this to that is least likely to respond? Michael if I sent it to him

27. Who is the person that you are most curious to see their answers? Same as above

28. Favorite TV shows? Weather Channel

29. Ford or Chevy? Ford

30. What are you listening to right now? Tchaikovsky Violin Concerto

31. How many pets do you have? 1, Her Glorious Majesty Puggles

32. Which came first the chicken or the egg? Don't know, don’t really care

33. What would you like to accomplish before you die? Move to Nicaragua

34.How many people are you sending this e-mail to? 0

35. What is your favorite comfort food? Home made chicken & noodles

36. When was the last time you laughed till you cried? Watching Monty Python

37. Who would you most like to meet? Buddha, I think I could learn something

Since March 28th 2006 entry of "50 Random Questions and Answers" is my most looked at page, I thought I'd add 37 more.

New! New! All around NEW!

...and faster than a speeding bullet. That is my new computer processor. My old Dell was getting long in the tooth and slower than molasses in January. Actually, if you look at it, the dang thing did things that a few years ago we could only dream of, but in the scheme of things now, it was slow...and prone to crashing. The old hard drive was getting cranky, the tech who installed my cable internet in early 2005 said it would die any day. She is still going, not dead but a bit feeble.

My friend Michael loves to play with computers so he took his 2 year old HP, added a new bigger hard drive, installed a DVD player, a CD burner, upped the memory (1 gig, my old one had 126mb) and a speedier processor. Mine was a 1Ghz ( the fasted in the world for about 3 seconds in 2000 when I got Mr. Dell) this one is a 3 ghz. Damn she is fast.....

Mr Dell is still around, lots of data and things on it. Eventually it will migrate to my sister's house where I may teach her how to use it and have it around when I visit. Mr Dell has some life left yet. He served me well, and will continue to be a part of my family for sometime to come.

Meanwhile, I LOVE speeding thru the net!

see ya!

Speading a Little Cheer

It's a short message and not even real personal: "Merry Christmas and Happy New Year from your friend Don. Take care!" It may not be much, but for the recipients, it is gold.

Sitting in their cold, stark, crowded and noisy cells the inmate will hear his or her name called for mail. They say nothing is as sweet as the sound of your own name. For those incarcerated their name called and a "you've got mail" is truly a magic moment.

"Someone cares, someone remembers, someone realizes despite my crimes I am still a human being with dignity", they think to themselves as they read the card. "I am someone who is lonely, someone who is in reality scared to death, humiliated beyond description, ruined, depressed, angry, despondent beyond words. I am someone who has to fight to live, endure incredible hardships, deprivation and humiliation. One day I was planning a night out with friends and making a note to get my car's oil changed. But in a whirlwind of calamity, I was handcuffed, stripped and given a number my freedom vanished. And now this stranger sends me a card and says he is a friend. "

"Maybe I can make it."

Get involved with Inmate penpals. Check out the link to Lost Vault on the links section of my blog. It is not for everyone, it demands a lot of time and patience. You may have to make the tough decision to stop writing someone because they are demanding, causing trouble or just not a good match. I have made at least 3 wonderful friends and look forward to their letters and cards.

If anyone would like to send a card to an inmate, contact me at donaldopato@gmail.com and I'll get a name and address out to you.

I may change a life....maybe even yours.

While Thousands Suffer in the Cold...Mattie Says Merry Christmas

It has been a while since I railed against our dumb ass boy Gov Mattie Blunt. Despite thousands being without power in the major metropolitan center of St Louis for over a week for the second time this year, Mattie had to take care of this pressing issue. Oh that's right, silly me, AmerenUE the electric calamity in St Louis is a friend of the Blunts, so the problem can't be theirs.

From the KC Star:

Although it’s been said many times, many ways, Missouri Gov. Matt Blunt has declared that state employees can say it too.

Blunt on Monday issued a directive to department heads asking them to assure state employees they would not be disciplined for saying “merry Christmas.”

“Last year, there was a great deal of public discussion regarding the Christmas season,” Blunt wrote in the memo. “Specifically, we heard from those who believe that the Christmas break should be called by a non-religious name such as ‘Winter Holiday.’ They also argued that traditional Christmas greetings such as “Merry Christmas” should not be used.

“Missouri state government employees should not have to worry about this matter. To ensure that there is no confusion regarding our state policy I am directing that each of you inform all members of your department that they should feel at ease using traditional holiday phrases, including ‘Merry Christmas’ and they should have no fear of official reprisal.

“I also ask that you inform your staff that the objections of those who are offended by these phrases be given due consideration, but that no state employee will be reprimanded or in any way disciplined for saying ‘Merry Christmas.’”

So how many employees had been reprimanded in the past for wishing people a merry Christmas? None, said Jessica Robinson, a spokeswoman for Blunt, who was unavailable for comment.

It was never a problem. Blunt sent out the directive in the wake of reports about retailers and others elsewhere instructing their employees not to use the phrase.

Religious conservatives have said there is a secular movement that has attempted to supplant Christmas and its religious elements with nonreligious terms such as “winter holiday” in schools and public places. Conservative Christians criticized President Bush for sending cards last year that wished people a happy “holiday season” but did not mention Christmas.

Observers on the left say the issue is a phony one that has been trumped up by conservatives, and they point out that “happy holidays” and “season’s greetings” have been used for decades.

Robinson made clear that Blunt’s directive does not prevent any state employee from wishing someone a happy holiday. Or a happy Hannukah or happy Kwaanza for that matter.

The Making of A Liberal

I am 1000% unashamedly Liberal. I support gay marriage and full gay rights, environmental laws, an end to the Iraq travesty, dialog not bombs and invasions with the radicals of the world, I support a Palestinian state but also recognize that Israel has a right to exist too, as do all groups, I am for separation of church and state, pro choice, pro stem cell research, pro universal healthcare, anti-privatization of services, pro prison reform and against the building of more prisons, I support tax increases when necessary to provide services, I support the right of assisted suicide under some circumstances, I think Government should provide services to all and not be restricting rights and meddling in personal affairs, I would support the end of the so called Patriot Act, and more I am sure I could think of.

How did I get this way?

I am a 50 year old white man. I was born in a smallish town in Central Illinois, went to public schools, even remember praying in school. I stayed pretty much around my small town, an occasional vacation broke up the monotony. I was raised by a pretty typical family, mom, dad, sister. Dad worked, mom stayed home, sister did her thing and I did mine. I was not a rabble rouser, I was a good boy. I was different as we all know now, but then I just thought it was normal to want to light your room with candles and listen to Beethoven. Despite that, I do not think I was highly influenced by my family. I did not see crushing poverty, injustice, discrimination or had a Communist for an Uncle, things that might make a leftist out of one.

I have a couple of theories however.

1) I did not have a heavy religious influence. Unlike some, I was not raised in a fundamentalist family. Church was never ridiculed but was also not a big deal. We went occasionally but not regularly. We were nice Methodists and supported the nearby church, but it just was not a big thing.

When I was a teen, the "Jesus Freak" movement was in full swing. It was cool to be religious for some folks. But it was a restrictive religion. "One Way" was their theme, only Jesus could save you and make you a true person. Not getting sucked into this, I think I developed a more open, questioning mind. I also never bought all the hocus pocus and divinity stuff. I truly believe Jesus lived and that he was one of the greatest minds of all time. Is he divine? That I am not so sure.

I somehow read the Bible differently than some. I tended to see Jesus as not a mean-assed "follow me or else" guy but someone who was a true radical and liberal (that statement usually makes the fundies howl) who brought the world out of the darkness, showed that we could all live together, railed against arbitrary, made up rules and showed us that the family of human kind was of utmost importance. Caring for everyone and equality is a sign of a true liberal, in my humble opinion.

Look up liberal in the dictionary. It usually relates to "generous", "tolerant", "non-judgmental", "not literal". Aren't those fundamental tenets of the teachings of Jesus?

2) Open Mind. I have a gift that is somewhat of a curse at the same time. I see every side of an issue. Liberal, as the definition states, is "not literal, tolerant". I am hardwired to believe that there are many ideas, many viewpoints and many circumstances to an issue. I refuse to see in black and white. For example, I think abortion is a terrible choice. It is traumatic for all concerned and does make the life of the fetus impossible to complete. Yet, I am never one to say to someone you can not have one. That is their choice. Maybe, just maybe, they have thought it through, it is the best thing for all involved. I can see their point of view.

Being this way can make it difficult to make a decision. But it also allows us to question our motives, re evaluate as things change and adjust for new reality. I would rather have a flip-flop liberal in Iraq than a "damn the torpedos, stay the course" approach of the "Conservatives" and risk certain defeat.

3) I read. As a kid, I read everything I could get my hands on. I looked at all views, I questioned things, I realized that it was not just about me. We had a huge diverse world out there and it was just possible that we as white Americans were not always 100% right. As I traveled the world as an adult, I found that to be very true.

4) Nicaragua. My beloved little Nicaragua showed me that a right wing powerful elite was one of the most destructive forces in all nature. Millions died of starvation, no health care, no homes, no work, no safety net. While a few got rich and worried about what palace to build. As I say this first hand, I vowed never to let this happen in my world. It almost has here, but lucky the people came to their senses and saw that some balance and checks had to be made.

There may be more reasons and these maybe totally the wrong ones. I continue to wrestle with this issue and may revisit it someday. Meanwhile, I remain Pato, proudly Liberal to the core.

Powerful

Finally my dear sister has power. After the ice storm of Wednesday the 29th she got it back sometime this evening. She is not sure when, but her answering machine came on when called at 9:30PM.

It is amazing how we are so tied to our power. We can't function without it. She was going nuts, not so much from the cold but from the lack of TV and communication. I'd be the same without my internet for sure.

Many more still wait for power and the power company is threatening its customers by saying if the states do not give them a big rate hike they want, the service will be worse. Bullshit... it will get worse anyhow, the big wigs will get more benefits and money like all the companies do. The customers will suffer.

Oh, and while most of St Louis froze, Boy Gov was hob-nobbing in Florida with his GOP money men.

Rich Does not Equal Smart

One of our most esteemed residents of the Towers had a cocktail party last Friday evening. The glitterati of Kansas City were invited. (Even dear little Pato was invited!) The names coming spoke of money, world famous businesses, generous donors and people accustomed to seeing large buildings named in their honor.

But for the most part, they are dolts. Case in point:

The Towers has its original 1915 elevator cab with updated mechanicals...updated to 1947 standards. Actually she works fine; the old DC current mechanics are so simple that nothing breaks down. The hemp guide rope is stronger than most steel cables. She does, however, have a couple of quirks. Due to her small size and age she is restricted to 1000lbs. This means no more than 3-4 people at a time. The old fashioned mechanical brakes will not level at the floors if there is too much weight. The cab will slide past the floor a foot or two. She also has a metal folding gate that closes and locks automatically but has to be opened manually at your destination.

Simple enough?

I wanted to put a small sheet of paper explaining these rules on the elevator but I was vetoed: 1) I was told no one would read it and 2) it had to be framed (rich people can't see loose sheets of paper, it is just not aesthetically pleasing). So they had to receive instructions on how to use the elevator from a live person. Even then they screwed everything up and at one point 6 people were on the elevator and it slid past the floor. They threw a ruckus.

So, if these are the high and mighty, the royalty of America, the captains of industry, the elite, the powerful, why then can't they take the time to read simple instructions, remember simple instructions and have some common sense? (Of course, common sense is really not all that common.) They expect their minions to know everything, to read every word they pen and know how to handle every situation. Maybe the richer you are the less you think?

So employees of many of KC's biggest employers here is a little tip: you have the right not to read signs and instructions and memos your bosses put out. They certainly don't. And if it is not framed or engraved, ignore it.

Saturday Bagel Musings

Well, Callalilly are you a bagel fan as well??? Callalilly is a faithful reader who claims I am dangerous for her diet by describing my taste for pancakes and pastrami. Today, I am musing over a fresh onion bagel with some cream cheese. My favorite bagel combination (well besides lox, cream cheese, capers and red onion). Something a bit different.

1) Bagels I thought I would explore the world of these delightful baked treats. The most common origin story states that the bagel originated in the late 1600s when a Jewish baker created them as a gift for The King of Poland to commemorate a battle victory that year. The baked good was fashioned in the form of a stirrup to commemorate the victorious cavalry charge. That the name bagel originated from beugal (stirrup) is considered likely.

Did you know bagels are formed, then boiled first before baking? This gives them the chewy dense center and the baking provides the crisper crust. I like mine toasted lightly.

2) Stranded. I read this AM that thousands are stranded along I-70 here in MO due to the winter storm. The road was closed in a large section for hours and people have reportedly spent the cold night in their cars with no gasoline for heat. Many accidents along the hilly road compounded the problem of ice and drifting snow. We received some snow and ice here in KC, but it was easily dispatched and is now gone from the roads. Replaced by some bitter cold.

In my previous career, I was a road warrior, traveling 60-70,000 miles a year on the roads of Missouri and Kansas. I spread my Human Resources cheer to many a town large and small, navigating many of these roads. I thank my lucky stars that I am now in a nice comfy home based job and that I didn't even get out of the parking lot for a couple days as I did not have to.

I am sure if I still worked for Beverly Enterprises (RIP), I would have been one of the many stuck out there. It would not have been a pretty sight.

3) Powerless. I fear for the stock market on Monday. My sister has been without power from the aforementioned storm that raced into Illinois on Thursday. It maybe until Tuesday before she gets her power and TV back. Meanwhile shares of QVC and other home shopping networks will plummet from lack of her business.

And she can't toast her bagel. But she did heat a can of soup in the sterno powered fondue pot she had stored. Proof positive that you should never throw anything away, it may actually come in handy someday.

snow snow snow Snow

Winter had kept its distance here in KC...until Wednesday. Just in time to screw up the week's events, here comes first the ice and then on Thursday the snow.

It played havoc with our dress rehearsal for the upcoming HMC Concert. We rescheduled the Wednesday dress to Thursday only to receive more snow and ice then. Makes one of the numbers we'll sing very timely:

"Snow Snow Snow SNOW! It won't be long before we'll be there with snow....snow....snow"

I could wait..